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May 20, 2018

May the Lord open your hearts and eyes to see clearly the path we are treading. May He deliver and bless us and bring us all to eternal life. Amen.

Dear ones, I wasted the whole day going around in circles. In fact, I think it's been two days already. My foolishness has truly been exposed in a way I could recognize and deal with. And I've been asking the Lord to do that: Lord! Please show me what I'm doing?!

Here we go again...Clare and her flesh.

It gets cold here in the mountains, and I needed one of those down-to-your-knees hoodies to keep me warm. I settled for Navy Blue--but that wasn't really what I wanted. I just settled for it. I thought to myself, at least it's warm. But the color bugged me...and bugged me...and bugged me. And I wonder who was behind that 'bug'?

And I was an Internet dupe last night.

I went on to do something that was important and I got hooked on a line about a mama bear leaving her two cubs in the lake to drown as she swam by herself to the island she lived on. The poor little things struggled in the water and began to grow weak and could barely hold their heads above water.

Well, it so happened that two Russian fishermen saw them and tried to rescue them. Of course, these hooks on the Internet aren't about to tell you if the rescue attempt turned out well or not. Of course not. Rather, they took a story told in one paragraph and stretched it out for 20 pages, with only two sentences and one photo on each page. And the rest of the page filled with skillful enticements to buy things you've searched for on the Internet.

But let me tell you... There was the perfect, knee-length, burgundy hoodie advertised on every single page they made me turn to so I could follow the story! I couldn't believe it. I had looked all over for something in that color, but couldn't find it. Here I am, after I've already bought the other one. And it's just FLASHING right in front of my face every time I turn the page on this thing!

They would give you enough of a sentence to make you curious about whether the bears lived or not. Then you had to turn to another page--and there was that burgundy hoodie! And another page and another burgundy hoodie, and on and on and on.

Finally, after I found out that the little cubs were saved... I clicked on that hoodie. Knowing that it was an invitation to get into trouble. I thought, 'Oh. I'll just look."

Right. You think you're strong enough to get into that swift-moving water of temptation?? Think again!

So, I decided to buy it, so I would have something for rough, everyday wear--with cat hairs and bark and dirt and everything on it. And something saved that was nice and decent.

Big mistake.

I opened the door and Ezekiel got sick all of a sudden. It just hit him out of the blue. And the Lord had told him "there were going to be times when he will be suffering for the country. But he is recovering. Most of the time he will be well. But there would be occasions when something will come up, and I may require him to suffer."

Well. This was MY fault. At least, I thought it was pretty much my fault. And I realized I had opened that door and really started repenting. I cancelled the order, and shared with my prayer partners how I had sinned and we prayed. I had already gotten the navy-blue hoodie. And I couldn't justify returning it.

So, I ended up, later on in the evening, after I had spent quite a bit of time in prayer, trying to figure out how to dye it. Now that I think of it, I couldn't GET into deep prayer for very long, because I kept thinking, 'How can I change the color on that hoodie?'

Dear ones, don't buy something you have a check in your spirit about. It never is good. You see, the Lord wants all His money to go to the poor for their necessities. And even though we had just given all our surplus to Nicaragua, and trafficked children, and Voice of the Martyrs--that didn't matter. The pittance that the sweatshirt was, was an extravagance in His eyes, compared to what these poor ones have to live without.

Demons line up around the block for just such an occasion, when we open the door by our selfishness. But it isn't their fault. Rather, it's my flesh and my selfishness that set me up. They just rode me until I gave in.

Still stubbornly following my flesh, I decided to dye the navy one with some dye I had around the house. But when I checked the fabric content, I saw it had much too much polyester to take the pigment. So, I went surfing for an answer. Well, there answers, but you'd have to spend money, and knew that wouldn't be pleasing to the Lord. And I started to see how I was wasting my life on vanity.

I guess it was my guardian angel, 'cause it was on the left side that I heard it. "Wouldn't you like to be free of this feeling of having to have everything your way?"

And I thought to myself, 'Yes! I sure would!'

Then I spoke to the Lord.

'Jesus, I see better now. I've been missing it. I can either wrestle with the details of life to get it just the way I want it. Or, I can ignore the details and concentrate on the true meaning and joy of my life. I can sit and pine away, trying to figure out how to get my way. Or, I can just relinquish my way and concentrate on what's really important.'

I do believe there is some sort of demon of Compulsion that I team up with, and I agree with. Like a nasty looking gorilla monster that's riding me like a racehorse right into the La Brea tar pits! He's got reins in my heart and my mind, and he's kicking me to go harder and faster and figure it out so I can have my way. But the truth is, I can't have my way. And the more I want my way, the more things affront my way and the more I'm tangled up in useless passions. Trying to figure out how to get it just the way I like it!

In the meantime, life is passing me by. Yes, I am flowing further and further down the river, while my dreams are high up in the mountains. And I'm going down into a deep, dark valley to be covered over with the mud of this world.

Oh, my dear Heartdwellers, Satan has perfected entrapments of every kind! And they are all goaded on by demons riding on our shoulders, urging us into that downward spiral, wasting time and stealing from the poor. If we can just abandon the purse of our own opinions and not be so attached to our own way, but make do, joyously. "Thank you, Lord, that I can't change the color of this hoodie. And thank you for helping me be free of wanting to."

Dear ones, I have always felt a check in my spirit when I take off on a project to satisfy my senses--be it food, clothing, plants, images, or whatever. It is such an abysmal waste of time.

The things that really count are on the inside, not the outside. This is the plan: steal your destiny.

Yes, if the enemy can get you all tied up in useless details of life--likes and dislikes--you will have nothing left for your mission and the Lord. Your mind will be locked on what you didn't get that you wanted, planning in the future to get it. Looking forward to that tiny bit of pleasure you gleaned from having just the right color, just the right taste, just the right shape, just the right texture. And you will be pandering to your flesh! While the deep things of life, the lasting satisfaction. The things that are rewarded in Heaven--go right by you with hardly a thought.

Or even worse, an illusion: "Hey, once I get what I want, then I'll be happy and get to work on the deeper things." What a lie and entrapment that is! You will never be completely satisfied; there will always be something wrong with what life offers you and you will still hunt for the right thing.

It's absolutely futile.

If we can just say, "NO!" from the start, we won't waste all that time and energy. It doesn't have to be 'special'. It can be common, simple, functional and maybe even awkward. And we can still keep our peace by not insisting on it being, "just right."

Lord, only Your grace can protect me here.

Jesus began, "Protect is the right word. But I cannot protect a mind that is stubbornly set on their own way. I must release them, so they can go off chasing endless rabbit trails that lead to nowhere.

"Even when you're looking for images for the messages, Clare. You go off, captivated by curiosity; finding just the right thing, and many times you pass it by just to look and see 'what else is there'. How many times do you end up coming back to the first image you saw?

"By the way. Did you know My Holy Spirit chooses pictures for you and puts them right up in front, so you don't have to waste time? But you still do. See? There is a place you can save time, maybe even 45 minutes, to apply to music.

"Oh Dearest, there are so many rabbit trails in your life. I am so glad you are beginning to recognize them for what they are: hooks set in your jaw by the enemy. When you recognize them, don't play with them! Put them down and run from them, back to the security of prayer and work. Don't allow yourself to be played like a fish, Clare.

"Now, you see? You are sharing a truth with your brothers and sisters, and your enemies are listening in. And they're planning their next move as they catalog your weaknesses. But the good news is they just raised the bar for you, to get stronger in resisting temptation. Tomorrow and next week you will have more temptations. Bigger ones. Flashier ones. And if you've learned anything tonight, you will recognize them immediately and run from them.

"However, if you fall for them again... Well, it's a long, dry walk around the same mountain, day after day.

"My people, don't let the enemy play you! Keep your intimate prayer time with Me; allow Me to strengthen you for the day and prepare you for the challenges. Keep your hearts centered on My agenda.

"You see, Clare has allowed herself to be drawn off course by so many cares of the world, that she's not steeped in prayer and music as I would have her to be--but in the world. Now that she recognizes more clearly her errors, she can work her way back into the deep places with Me. And beautiful things will flow out from there, a virtual river of life.

"But it is almost impossible to want the choicest things in life when your appetites are set on your flesh. You suffer from this; you become weak and spiritually emaciated.

"And for you who still expect good things from Satan. You can learn all these techniques for entrapment and apply them in your curses--but you do not see the entrapment to the lies of Satan that you're living your lives by. You know what I am telling her is so true, because you use it against your enemies. But you cannot hear Me when I tell you that you are pitifully trapped by your passions, which Satan has promised to satisfy.

"He cares nothing for you! He's just using you to try and hurt Me. And his hell is NOT filled with delights, but fire and brimstone and endless torments.

"Do you think I rejoice over your end? I do not. I brought you forth in love, hoping for the best for you. But Satan used the weaknesses of man to wound you so deeply, that all you can think about is how to avoid pain and control others, and bring them down for a supposed reward from a demon who has nothing but temporary perks and eternal fire to reward you with.

"I call to you, those of you trapped in the darkness. I cry over you and I call to you, 'Turn around and come to Me, repenting before it is too late. Examine closely the character of the one who says he will reward you.'

"He has resources on Earth to reward you with, because he is the god of this world. But it ends the day you die and his demons come for you, pulling you into the abyss with hooks and chains. There you will be tormented with the foolish ones who sold their souls for the very same promises.

"Wake up! You're living a lie! Just like he has taught you how to lie and deceive others, he is lying and deceiving you.

"Why? Because he hates you!

"You see, you still have a chance to inherit eternal life and live in Heaven with Me forever. He has lost that right and only has eternal torment to look forward to. He made his decision. So, to get even with Me for throwing him out of Heaven, he works day and night to take you with him to the fires I created only for him and his fallen angels. NOT for you.

"Yes, he will scream out at Me, 'Hey! I got this one! I got that one! I hate you Son of the most High God. I will take every one of your creations and pervert it, bringing it down to Hell with me!'

"Who do you think is responsible for destroying the Earth? Stripping it of its gardens and coral reefs, destroying the environment to create more suffering to My creatures. Yes, it is he, because he can only create a wasteland. He has no power to create a Garden of Life, because everything he touches turns to death.

"Is this who you want to spend your eternity with? Being burned, cut open and stripped of your skin--only to have it grow back again to be tortured eternally?

"This does not have to be your end!

"Listen to the way I treat Clare, even on her worst days. Look at the way I protect her from you! 'You can go this far--and no further!' Look at the way I bless her. And while you are at it, look at the way she has grown, with thousands of others who have also grown closer to Me--because they overcame Satan's plans to destroy their lives.

"Really. Take the time to look, listen and think about who you are serving. I want you back, but you must make the choice. I don't care what you've done. I have seen every moment of your life. And yes, I was there with you when you did it.

"But I hung on a Cross to pay for your sins, because I love you and I want you back.

"Think on these things, souls steeped in darkness and lost to the Truth. Think on this. I loved you enough to die for your sins. Do you think Satan would do the same for you?

"And for the rest of you, My family, who have gotten off track following your flesh. You will never have happiness down that road; it is a dead end. Make the decision now to circumcise and cut away the flesh and live for the abundant life I am offering to you in the spirit.

"Come to Me, just as you are. I will help you to see clearly to repent and be restored to the Kingdom. Then I will make of you a Vessel unto Honor and reward you with the work of your dreams, and clothe you in My salvation.

"My Father will no longer see your failures and your filth; He will only see your glory. The glory that I dress you in.

"Come to Me. I will protect and bless you, and deliver you from the torments of Hell."