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March 6, 2019

Lord, You call us to come and join You, as You go through Your Passion, by using the Stations of the Cross. You have told us that it is one of the most intimate journeys we can make with You, sharing Your very suffering for our souls. Thank You for the testimony to this dear soul of how precious this journey can be to our hearts. May we all find our own, unique walk with You down the Via Dolorosa by Your side. Amen.

One of our dear Prayer Warriors had recently been desiring to draw even closer to the Lord than she was. Clare's advice to her was: pray the Stations of the Cross. A former physician and the victim of serious physical trauma herself, she is well-versed in the needs and sights that come daily to a busy ER. The Lord used her knowledge to greatly enlarge her journey down the Stations of the Cross not too long ago. We'd like to share her journey with you.

Her letter began, "Dear Clare, I am writing to fulfill my promise to you to record what occurred when I followed your directions to meditate on the Lord's wounds.

"To begin, I had asked you: How I can get closer to the Lord? I had attempted this exercise--or something similar to it, in my mind--when I pray the Stations of the Cross.

"These were wonderful spiritual experiences for me, but they were not the ones that I engaged in often; I suspect that there were a great deal of feelings of unworthiness, as well as fear of not encountering Him at all, that put hesitation to me.

"I had tried for months just to sit with the Lord and wait patiently upon Him, for His time to communicate with me. Needless to say, after months of very frequent-to-daily efforts, I saw little to no fruit. I asked for your recommendation, and then you told me to meditate upon the Lord's wounds. So, I decided to take your advice.

"I cannot say that I knew exactly what this meant; but I knew what it meant to me. I am not certain what happened next. I think I began by imagining Him before me. I recall that I saw feet--bloody feet--immediately before me, at ground level.

"For some reason, I decided to begin tending His wounds by addressing the issue of His Crown of Thorns. I realized, then, that I was bending down towards Him. He had been removed from the Cross and was sort of crouched before me, leaning against a tree, looking more like blood and gore than a human being--or Our Lord.

"I must admit, as a former ER physician well used to severe trauma, I would have routinely addressed this matter rapidly and professionally. And in the past, I certainly would have separated some part of my emotions from my thinking. In this instance, I did not do any of this. In fact, this all then became quite scary for me. I felt like I was without my protective shell, open and naked before Him. I did not move rapidly; rather, I moved slowly, gently, and tenderly--always aware of His pain and suffering.

"My spiritual sight had been gone for about six years at this point, (and is only now returning) but I found that I could see much more than I expected to--including details that I was heretofore unaware of.

"I began by slowly attempting to ease off the Crown of Thorns, which was covered in dried blood and adherent, in many places, to skin, muscle, & hair. Thorns had pierced the skin in many places and were held fast. And it had pierced His right eye--His eye was damaged, hooked by one of the thorns.

"Bowls appeared at my side, filled with what look like water, clean linens, and some type of unguent. I would not have thought to create these myself. They simply appeared, to my right; I had the feeling the Blessed Mother had prepared them for us, in order to facilitate this time with her Son and to treat His wounds.

"Teasing off this Crown of Thorns gently took time and patience. I did not want to hurt Him. Please know that I've always tried to be gentle with my patients, when I practiced medicine, but at no time in the past had I been treating my Spouse and my Savior! This required a very different level of love, gentleness, and care than I was used to giving, in such circumstances (I am sorry to admit). Although I have been through countless decades of trauma treatment, as both a patient and physician, I found myself moving slowly and somewhat shyly.

"The Crown of Thorns could finally be removed, even from His eye, which was very damaged as a result of the thorn. I had the feeling that there was something special about the water that was given to me. Was it blessed? Was it Water of Lourdes? I don't know. It was simply there for my use, and I prayed that it would help with His pain and healing.

"I am not used to moving this slowly and lovingly. I felt very unworthy to the task. I gently used the linen cloths and the water to wash the blood from His hair, scalp, and face. I recall this taking quite some time; and I am always used to rushing. I am well aware of a demon within me, who refers to itself as "Rush, Rush!"

"I noticed that, as the linen cloths and water became used and bloody, they were simply and immediately replaced with fresh materials.

"When the wounds were sufficiently cleansed, I covered them with the unguent and bound them in fresh linens, as best I could. I felt in my heart that this was Mary's, and that it would help with pain and healing and it would retard infection.

"We moved on to treating each hand--or, rather, I should say "wrist." When I looked closely, I saw wounds through each wrist, beginning from the palmar side (the inner side) and extending through externally (to the side we see knuckles). I used the linen cloths and water as before, slowly, gently, and--most of all--lovingly, to cleanse the wounds (both sides), one at a time. And then bind them with unguent on both sides of each wrist, followed by fresh cloths.

"In truth, I feel as if I am even now reliving this experience now. I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit strongly, and I am crying as I relate this. I am grateful to feel this now. Only now can I acknowledge how very small my heart was; and how very much He is enlarging it!

"I felt the Lord's presence strongly during these ministrations. I had never before addressed such matters with this degree of love, gentleness, tenderness--without the need for the rapidity of action I was used to in the emergency room. (Which, I now believe, was not only ER efficiency, but also part of a protective outer shell).

"I admit that working so slowly and with such great love was very difficult for me. It is growing significantly easier, but I still have a ways to go. Part of me wanted to hide, because I was not worthy to minister to Him. I have no doubt He was aware of this, as He is aware of my feelings now, even as I write this--for He knows all.

"As I continued, slowly and intently, on my tasks, I could feel His presence very strongly, and I prayed mine would give Him comfort during this difficult time. I knew that this was my Spouse and my Savior. I feel compelled to say that. And... I could be wrong here, but this was and is on my heart. Love and gentleness is what connected us, heart to heart, and deepened this experience to something I had never felt before.

"I continued further down, to His feet. I will try now to recall the details for you. I should have written this down earlier, but I did not have sufficient means to do so. I suspect this is just an excuse created by demons, which I (unfortunately) listened to at the time.

"I believe I attempted to soak His feet in the water first, in an effort to remove some of the blood and dirt, without causing more pain.

"Then I began the process of slowly and lovingly washing His feet, using the linen cloths and the water given to me. I felt the urge to rush. I must always fight against this urge, thanks to the "rush, rush" demon. I suspect that the Lord helped me with this, because it was not nearly as difficult as usual.

"When His feet and wounds were cleansed, both top and bottom, I placed the unguent on both sides of each wound, with something akin to a tongue depressor, which had been provided for me, for unguent placement. Then I wrapped the wounds and His feet with clean linens.

"In retrospect, I cannot say that I meditated so much as I cleansed--with patience, gentleness, and love for my Spouse and Savior. This was the newest aspect introduced into my prayer & meditation at the time, I believe. It was during this time that I drew more closely to Him and felt His presence so much more profoundly than I had in the past.

"I must be honest here and admit that this degree of closeness was both wonderful and disconcerting, because I felt naked--truly bare before Him... without any protective shell that I was aware of.

"I hesitated then, before approaching Him again. Because, as wondrous as it was, I also felt so unworthy. Please know that such thoughts of condemnation would never come from Him! I asked the Lord to help me with these negative feelings so that I could feel more love, more faith, more compassion, and more trust. And over time, He accomplished all of this and more.

"I am still a work in progress, and He has more work to do in these areas, but I have no doubt that He will finish the work He has begun. I can feel the fruit of His labors in my heart, mind, body, soul, and spirit.

"When I returned to Him, in order to sit with Him and spend time with Him, I found this particular exercise went a great way toward, I suppose, the melding of our hearts and minds. And it facilitated closer, more loving communication that I could feel in every way.

"For the first time, I began to run to Him for help, for comfort, for wisdom, and simply for loving company--to receive and, when possible, to give."

That's the end of her letter.

And again - for those of you who have not yet been introduced to, or made time, to pray your way through the Stations of the Cross, I would strongly encourage you to do so!

We don't have a published version specific to the Channel here, but there are many, many fine interpretations out there to help you. Just type in Stations of the Cross in your browser and see what comes up and let the Holy Spirit lead you to the version that He has found suited for you. He'll do that.

For those of you who enjoy illustrations, or music to accompany those words, YouTube also has several versions. You can follow along praying with them; this is my favorite way to do it. I'll share with you one of my favorite versions. It is done by Fr. Kevin Scallon and his sister-in-law, Dana. This can be found on YouTube easily. Just type in Fr. Scallon Stations of the Cross and it'll take you right to it. And if you go to his site there on YouTube you can purchase this as a CD and do it that way, too, as well.

I would also like to remind you before we leave, that our newest book, When God Heals and When He Doesn't is available from Amazon. Or if you would like it for free, send Clare a postcard or letter, with your address, and she will be glad to send you a free copy. We have priced it as low as we possibly can through Amazon, but they do demand a basic price. We are NOT looking for profit from these books. We are simply wanting to get the teachings the Lord's given us on various topics compiled together into these book, and so they can be out to our people.

We are close to finishing the next book, too: A Hope in Winter Comes. The first part of this book will be from Clare's journal back from the 1990's. She was part of a group of people in Florida, and Mary and Jesus made many visitations to this group, and she scribed them all in her journal. And then, to the end of that book, we are also adding in all of the teachings that Jesus has recently given us about Mary and her role in the Church.

Thank you, Dear Heartdwellers. Thank you for all that you do for us and for all your prayers. They are so greatly appreciated. May the Lord bless you now.

May the Lord bless you, dear Heartdwellers. You are dearly loved!