The resources section has ideas/links for left behind packages

July 5, 2021

God bless you, dear family. Well, I have been under conviction lately, and the Blessed Mother came during worship, she came during the Rosary and spoke to one of the sisters in the room. And I was really beating myself up, but sister said that Our Lady came to her and said, "Stop beating yourself up." Of course, I could not just stop beating myself up, I had to get a few more punches in, but...

Later, after the Rosary she began to speak to me. And the sister that saw her said she came around behind me and wrapped her arms around me, trying to comfort me. And I did not see or feel her, and I said I feel so terrible, mother, the Lord has called me to be someone else and I have squandered money that should have fed the poor.

I heard, "The poor you shall always have with you. Just pick up where you left off Beloved daughter. Go back to where you left off...the Lord forgives you Clare."

It is the gray areas that are so confusing. Show me, teach me the way I should go, I long to be back in that place when I first took my vows.

And then she said, "Shall we go aside?" Because we were in the middle of the community rosary and she was inviting me to step into a quiet environment, which I knew would happen after community prayer.

I returned two hours later due to necessary interactions with those around me. Precious mother, forgive me for being gone so long. Are you still wanting to talk to me?

"I surely am", she said. "Remember Clare, your charism is to live on the edge of want, but not appear to be wanting for anything, because you have my son. You may have what you need to create, within reason, child. I think you know when you are being dishonest."

And yes, I do. Sometimes I get too many art supplies. And I went through that when I was working on the portrait of God the Father. And the other thing is, it is so against my nature to be on the edge of want. I want to be on the edge of,' we have everything we need, chill, and do it.' And she is saying no, we need to be on the edge of want and that goes so much against my character, especially because we live out in the wilderness.

Then she continued and said, "Do not stifle your conscience because after a while it will be seared shut. People do not understand, it is the little foxes that ruin the vine. Psalm 51:10. This is how Satan gains entrance in your lives, little by little. Were a demon to make a big move you would be leery and refuse, but in little steps, little gradations, over time, he can gain entrance. This is a universal tactic of evil.

"The secret to stopping that is nipping it in the bud, before it blossoms into full blown avarice. Consider the result, in your mind go all the way down the road to see where it ends. For instance, let us say you are shopping for a refrigerator. As you are looking for them over you see one that is very plain, it has an adequate freezer and ample shelves, plenty of room, is plain white and it will work fine. Then you spot another one, stainless steel, with swivel shelves and drawers, pull out ice maker and water dispenser, and a freezer on the side with an extra-large capacity. This one is almost double the price, but it has all the nice features and is not a big white eye sore. Thank goodness, that has not been my soft spot. I would have gotten the white one.

But she is trying to demonstrate a point here.

"Then comes the kitchen appliances, top of the line blender, food processor, and a stove with a grill and oven, plus 6 burners, a chef's dream. All you need is a stove with an oven, but this one lots of nice features. Meanwhile in Madagascar children are starving and eating mud to stay alive, they could sure use that extra $1500 you would spend on a top-of-the-line appliance.

"You see it all happens little by little. You see something, and you begin to covet it, you reason with yourself that it is needed and soon you have talked yourself into something extravagant when something simple would have worked fine. You violate your conscience, and it begins to die. The next time you decide about something you have a set a standard of getting the best when common would do nicely. So, little by little your conscience is covered over in scar tissue, and you have no moral compass about these things.

"Most of the time, Clare, you choose very carefully and keep it simple. You really have done very well in providing for the community what is necessary. But because you are out in the wilderness and concerned about not having what you need when you need it, you tend to over provide, rather than leave yourself open to not having what is needed when it is needed.

"That also happens with books and art supplies. You have overdone it in the past. I know you are ashamed Clare, and I do not want to shame you anymore, but your lapses in Franciscan poverty are a bad example to others. Better to go without than to have too much. Besides that, St. Francis did not like excessive curiosity, books and learning. He preferred the brothers to serve the lepers rather than delve into the mysteries of the faith. Besides, my Son is fully capable of revealing mysteries scholars have hungered to know, but without the books and endless research.

"Charity, compassion, a heart to supply the basic life needs of the poor, these are the virtues you should cultivate in the community, not book learning. That can and will become a stumbling block if you do not nip it in the bud. Do you understand, Beloved?"

I do mother, and my conscience is smarting right now. We have books we do not need.

"You also have a few sparse books you do need and those are acceptable. But an emphasis on learning will surely kill the vocation suiting a simple brother and sister, rich in love, yet poor in earthly goods. This is the standard you need to set and maintain. There will be unending temptations to go overboard because the devil hates Evangelical poverty. He wants to destroy any monastery that lives by this rule.

"He wants the brothers to be so preoccupied with nice appointments for the altar."

He would not let me get new linens, or, new, you know, new alter vestments, or anything when father was ordained. They were all hand me downs, and boy, did I have plans and boy, did He nip that in the bud.

"The devil wants the brothers to be so preoccupied with nice appointments for the altar, extensive books for the library, gourmet food, media center and video library, etc. etc. that they are preoccupied with storing, cleaning, watching, protecting, one thing after another. And one is never satisfied with the basics, there is always another book or another video.

"You are not to become cloistered with educational tools, so much so that there is no time for prayer. Don't you understand that Jesus will tell you all you need to know? You do not need to go surfing for current events.

"The true delight in a monastery is to dwell with God in His holy temple and present to Him the souls that need your prayers. This is where the power and the glory are. Not in learning more about the customs of Jesus day, or archeological findings. Once you become enamored of these things the enemy is leading you away from the holy gospel and its simplicity, into a world of wonders you can never fully know about, thus the hunger for books and knowledge robs you of the sweet companionship of the Lord. You know He is fully able to tell you what is going on in the world and what you need to pray for.

"He longs for your company and even the sweet melodies you make for Him. This is what brings Him comfort along with passionate prayers for those who do not know Him and will soon be dying. Please my children, do not lose your focus, pray for those who will soon be dying. Spend time with those who do not know Him and tell them what your relationship is like and what He has done for you. You would be shocked to know how little, true understanding most people have about Him.

"His humanity is so alluring. To know that He suffered even as we do is so comforting. Most have this notion that it is all about religion, when in fact Heart Dwellers know it is all about relationship. People hunger for authentic love and acceptance, just the way they are. They do not want to have to live up to a bunch of rules to know God, as a matter of fact, they have long ago determined that they are far too sinful to approach God. That is heartless legalism when they are looking for a place to lay their weary heads and be understood and even find help to overcome the problems in their lives.

"My People, those around you who do not know God as you know Him are languishing. They have written off religion as an impossible discipline in their lives. They know all too well that they are sinners, but what they do not know is that they cannot save themselves, nor does Jesus expect them to. Rather He came to save sinners and redeem them from the curse of eternal death. He came to make sense out of their lives. He created each one and knows when they stand and when they sit, what brings them joy, what horrifies them, and they have all written off Jesus as unattainable. Nothing could be further from the truth, He has come in human form to be approachable, to touch them where they hurt and bring them healing, even when the pain is self-inflicted by sin.

"Somehow you must reach inside their hearts and make Jesus attainable, unconditional, and always present to hear their pleas, their sorrows, their frustrations, their failures and their dreams. This is the real Jesus, totally human, totally undiminished deity that created mankind, that knows all about their struggles and CARES, very personally, for them.

"Please my people, reach out to those who are suffering and alienated from God by their own presumption that He does not want to have anything to do with them. Nothing could be further from the truth. It is beyond their comprehension that Jesus longs for them with arms wide open. He desires their companionship, their friendship, their worship. He longs for them. This is a truth that very few will accept at face value. Just like you tonight, could not accept the invitation to listen to the Song of Solomon with Him for your rest time because of your feelings of guilt and inadequacy, and this is how most people feel all the time.

Mother how do we do this?

"You begin by reflecting His love and reaching out to help with their most necessary needs. If you are loving them in your midst, you are reflecting how He treats you, and that will draw them. Love always draws, condemnation always alienates. It is His kindness that leads to repentance. Romans 2:4

"Now I am asking you children to take these words to heart and begin to touch those who have shunned religion. We will be with you as you do. The Spirit of the Lord is indeed upon you...go and set the captives free. That is Luke 4:18.

And that was the end of her sweet, sweet message.