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November 20, 2016

S: ...exactly right. And if there are organs that were already suffering from a demon associated with an illness, this toxic blood, it's fertile soil for that other demon to flourish, so problems get worse. And many folks, I'm realizing, don't know how much worse - because we've not been told until fairly recently, that this bitterness is really an issue. And it's getting worse. He has said, "Please, please My children, I implore you. Clean them at least twice a day. I implore you." There's things that He doesn't want to happen, I think by spiritual laws He must give in to happen when bitterness is allowed to persist.

There's only so much He can do with healing of other organs, you know - it takes longer. They get sicker. He say, "Please - I'm giving you the root, clean out those seeds, it'll be much better." So, this is what He does and then everything is closed up. Then I sit for a minute, and I guess I can say I feel a difference. Even when other things are going on, I just - I feel Holy Spirit tingles all over my body, just kind of like a caress that lets Him know I'm on the right track, I did well.

And He'll often say to you, "Well done. Well done, My daughter. Well done, My son." And you may hear that, or you may not. You may just feel it. Sometimes, I'll just smile out of the blue, I just start smiling like crazy and I know that's not me. Like right now, I'm just smiling like crazy! But that's what He wants us to do. And, of course, you know in the beginning if you're uncertain after you do this, someone who speaks in tongues can certainly check. Someone who speaks and understands tongues can definitely check, so that you can find out if your method is successful.

I guess...I'll have to ask what to do about that, 'cause I don't know how many have the gift of understanding or the gift of tongues. But tongues in general will do it, you just are uncertain of what part is what. It's just - in the end, it's done.

C: Let me ask you this. The thing is, repentance. You know. So you're gonna ask for these things to be removed, but do you need to connect emotionally or do you need to connect with the fact that you need to repent?

S: Yes. In the beginning, He wants you to envision this process while you're praying. All your repenting for what you did, at least you know about, and I ask Holy Spirit, "Tell me what I don't know about." For what you did. And many of these things, I can look back and say, "I know, I was irritated. I behaved well, much better than I was - but it was still there." We all know - it's all or nothing with the Lord. Little bit of irritation? That's it. He doesn't want us to feel that way.

C: If we can have a genuine heart of thanksgiving, 24/7, these things can't happen. Period. They just can't happen.

S: Yes. Funny you should say that, that's just what I was doing. Yeah - He's really been pointing it out to me, when things are not good, and I have to say, "Well, then - thank You that they're NOT GOOD, Lord! Thank You that they're not good. I can offer it all back to You. I wouldn't have had an offering, but now I have an offering! Thank You!" And when I do that, I actually start to feel thankful. I told you, when I got cursed - I actually got cursed in the middle of prayer, I feel the curse landing - only a couple of pings - and I started saying, "Thank you!" to the person who cursed me. "Thank you, you bring me closer to my Lord. Thank you, you've done a wonderful job, I can't believe you work for Lucifer. You've so deepened my relationship with my Lord. Thank you - I bless you!" Then I tell them about, please repent, we love you... But I genuinely mean it when I start speaking, He changes my heart so that I truly believe this. I don't want to lie!

C: right - or putting up a front. Yeah, it's not a play-acting thing, you're serious.

S: And you're absolutely right - if we have a heart of thanksgiving all the time, it literally changes the soil. They can't land. My problem is, as a human, is gonna be a second I don't have one (truly grateful heart). In that 24 hours, the mind's gonna slip and that one second is all its gonna take. If I get a little... it still feels planned - a little distraction, a little irritation, and the Lord will permit, because again, it's an offering and He wants to teach us how to avoid these things.

And you're absolutely right - a true, pure heart of gratitude and thanksgiving absolutely ruins it, in fact it stopped the curse completely - it could not alight. It got a couple of pings, it just died. It couldn't stay. It was wonderful! I just - the first time I ever experienced that. And it was only because I got cursed when I was praying and happened to hear, "curse landing" and I just said, "Thank you so much! This brings me so close to Him." And it does. It brings me close, because I just spent a lot of time with Him getting rid of the curses. It's absolute thanksgiving.

You spoke about that 100% right.

C: yeah...

S: He wants us to follow it. He doesn't want this time for many of us - some of us will still travail. But for others, who are having difficulty, not because He wants us to, but because the seeds are permitting other things to happen and by spiritual law, He can't protect you from that. You can ask Him to remove it all, but He's taking it as an offering and saying, "Please, please - My children. Please, I'm telling you, clean these seeds at least twice a day." And if you get irritated a lot more, do it right when you do it, as much as you can when you're irritated. Repent and say, "Please remove this." And usually it's a cough, a burb, a sneeze - that's it. They're nothing.

C: And I noticed that I tend to be quick, just - get it done. That kind of attitude. And I noticed that I felt like that wasn't going to work, and it was probably Holy Spirit letting me know that. And I was on my knees and I waited, probably waited a good ten minutes until I started to feel compunction for what I had done.

S: During that time, how did you feel? Did you feel a change during that 10 minutes?

C: Oh, yeah. Well, when I was done, yes. I finally came to realize, you know, He finally convicted me. It took a while for Him to convict me, because I tend to be...gloss things over, I move fast, you know. And it took a while. I had to force myself. You're like me that way, I had to force myself to be still and quiet and to wait on the Lord, because I knew there was things - but I didn't know precisely. Some of them I knew, some of them I didn't know. But I was waiting for conviction, and when the conviction came I was able to really repent and say that I was sorry for having offended the Lord. Because being sorry because you got a seed doesn't cut it. You know, you have to be...

S: Right, being sorry that you are now bittered up His house

C: Yeah, yeah. That doesn't cut it. What cuts it is that you hurt Him, you offended Him. You know. And His heart - I mean, He's God. His heart is delicate, it's not like...

S: It's so pure, we can't understand it.

C: Right, right. So, one little bit of irritation, He's looking at it in the sense, I get the feeling sometimes, He's saying, "All of this I've given you, and all these things are going well for you in your life - and you complain over a little frustration over a phone call? And you can't offer that up to Me without getting upset? That's an offense to Him! It's an ungrateful heart. That's the source of it. Ingratitude.

S: Yep.

C: And I think a real true saint doesn't become perturbed, you know. Like the saints that - you know, some of the saints, whose writings we have read - they - I don't think they. They got to the point where nothing bothered them any more. Everything - because they were in such a state of gratitude and love for the Lord. Those things just didn't bother them, they just flew off of them.

S: Well, the one thing that you mentioned the other day, about loving the Lord and being IN love with the Lord, turns out to be, I think, the crux of - it's certainly all my efforts, and all my existence. What it boils down to is - and I never thought I'd say this - but (before He came for me). But it comes down to I'm so in love with Him, I don't want Him to suffer because I erred.

I don't want Him to feel ungratefulness from me, because He's done so much for me. Including absolute miracles. I don't want to return that to Him. I feel terrible! I'm truly repentant that I did that - I start crying, a lot. I don't want self-pity. Self-pity is NOT, that's pride. True repentance, you know. And I ask Him to get rid of the self-pity, so I just truly repent with my heart. And He does - I cough it out, and I hear "self-pity, self-pity, self-pity".

C: Well, and you know we're gonna have to ask the Lord to show us our self-pity because a lot of people don't know the difference between self-pity and true contrition. Show us the difference between feeling sorry for ourselves and feeling sorry for offending God. Those are two different ball parks altogether.

But I wanted to mention that, when I had knelt for a while and allowed Holy Spirit to work in my heart and bring conviction - that I did end up burping. Well, I sighed, there were a few sighs, you know and there were a few burps. And then last night something happened that I got upset and I brought it to the Lord, and immediately repented - and I was burping for the next 15 minutes. Just out of nowhere, it was like - Wow! That's a lot of seeds!

S: He sometimes, also - He gives you gifts. He'll take other things that, for example, if you - you've mentioned your Fibromyalgia. He may lessen that a little. It's just a present for, yes, for "following My will, listening to My will." He's been hammering (on me) I actually texted someone else right now about a message, and He's saying that - you know. "Please, it's My will not thine. Don't worry about what you have planned, 'cause I'M the one you need to worry about and I will make sure it works out okay." And the one thing He pointed out was, man - if I get something that I did that He didn't want me to have, that is NOT gonna end well. So...